I was searching through my closet and I found some things dear to me earlier, missing. One, my hoodie and second, your heart. You took both of them with you and never returned. This got me thinking. When we were together, you thought you knew everything about me, everything that I felt, everything that I liked. So, now that we aren’t together anymore, let me reveal to you things that you never knew. I never told you these things myself because I had grown to the idea that ‘the way you liked things to be was the best way for things to be’. Well, they weren’t or else we would have stayed together.
I want to tell you that I never had a thing for getting up in the morning late but one day, when I had tried to get out of bed at around 5 in the morning, you pulled me and tugged me in the blanket, kissing me and sushing me back to sleep. It was the best sleep I had in a while and after that I never tried getting up early again.
I wanted to tell you that I love my coffee hot and light, not the way you liked it, cold and dark. But since everyday you woke up before me and made me coffee, I never complained because this small gesture meant a good beginning of the day to me.
I hated cricket, and I’ve always liked football. But whenever we came home from the office and you switched on the tv, I never asked you to watch the football match because I knew that you’ll get bored soon and would go to sleep rather than being with me on the sofa, keeping your arms around my waist and my head resting on your shoulders. I liked it that way.
I wanted to tell you that I never liked the yellow coloured dress that you bought for me when we went to shopping together. I agreed to wear it on my birthday only because you said that I looked beautiful in it. And at that point of time, that was all I needed.
I also want to tell you that I would always prefer eating food bought from a dhaba, on our terrace together, rather than going to an extravaganat restaurant for having some continental food. I had always been ‘desi’ but because of you, I thought that trying new things would not harm. And believe me, after you left, I’ve been eating a lot of paneer tikkas and rumali rotis.
Also, do you remember our last movie date? I tried so hard not to sleep while the movie was on, but I failed miserably and that too many a times. I don’t know if you noticed. Or maybe you didn’t care. You didn’t know, but I loved science fiction a lot more than love stories. But while I was in love with you, they seemed bearable. But now, I live on movies like Star Wars and Interstellar.
I don’t know if you’ll ever get to know about the things I like. I know you don’t care anymore. But if you ever read this, then just know that you thought you were perfect and you knew me better than anyone but you didn’t, because you never cared to ask. Now that I think about it, I feel that you knew me the least. I still wonder when this relationship turned into a compromise that I couldn’t keep on making anymore.
Lastly, if you ever get a chance, send me my hoodie back because there’s still a place left for it in my closet, but not for your heart.